I Won't Tell You What She Really Thought of Wal-Mart

Irony always makes me stop and wonder.

Spring in Texas

Lately I have been feeling down. It has taken me a while to figure out why, but I think I have.

I'm Still a Wishy-Washy Pile of Goo

What they say about time is true, it does heal. It doesn’t take away the hurt, the void, the deep desire to have my mom back, but the constant pain is no longer there. I’m a little sad because on one level I feel that I am learning to not need my mom. I don’t ever want to not need her and I am afraid that with time, her memory will fade a bit. I’m trying to keep it fresh for my sake and for my kid’s sake. But my daughter doesn’t remember her being here anymore. That is hard to take.

Sometimes an Outhouse is the Only Place "To Go"

I remember my first experience with death. I was very young. He was Mr. May and he worked at a gas station. Back then we called them service stations because they served their customers. I don’t remember Mr. May but his wife babysat me and they were friends of my mom. I thought they were really old but most likely they weren’t much older than I am now. I remember being told that the service station was robbed and Mr. May was shot and killed. I overheard details that really bothered me but I never told. My mom and my brother went to his funeral while I stayed home with my dad. We played. I think he was trying to keep me busy so I wouldn’t ask questions.

If I Had a Wig I Sure Wouldn't Put It in a Potpourri Box

One week away from Christmas. My kids are so excited. I think this is the first year that they really get what is going on. Last year they seem to understand completely, but this year we have worked really hard to explain the real meaning and we have involved them in all of the decorating and baking. Their attention spans were shorter last year and they were easily bored. I hope, with the exception of a few meltdowns and tantrums, they will finally be able to file away some permanent memories this Christmas. 

I Wonder If Alvin Ever Got That Plane

I need to feel needed.

There I said it. Time to close up shop. Carole has figured it out. No more self-analyzing, agonizing or feeling like poo. I get it all now.

When All Else Fails...Jump Off the Ledge Into a Pile of Pillows

The other day we were driving somewhere. My kids were watching something and I was in my little world behind the wheel. The question from the back seat was, “Mom, what are you afraid of?” I didn’t hesitate. “I’m afraid of either one of you getting hurt or sick. I’m afraid that I’m not doing a  good enough…..”

“But Mom, what are you afraid of?”

I Can Admit When I Am Wrong

I’m considered middle aged. I have to “highlight” my hair, take acid reducer, avoid certain foods and the print on everything has dramatically decreased. I am aging. Historically when you age you get to a point where you have wisdom, life experiences and you just kind of stop caring what others think about you and what you do. I don’t seem to be at that point completely. For the most part I don’t care what others think and I will say pretty much whatever I think. I am polite, but for me almost no subject is untouchable. If you ask, I’ll tell. Except for that one thing….(insert smiley face).

I Have a Shovel and I'm Not Afraid of Spiders!

I have moved. I am now, again, a homeowner and I am beyond thrilled. I love my home and the space and the lock on the bathroom door. I love the peace.

Good Bye Ugly Naked Guy, This Spider is Blowin' Away

I’m on the move…….again. Not today, but we are days away from finally moving to our new house. People keep asking me if I am excited. I don’t know what I am. I’m sure excitement is in there, but I don’t feel exactly like I thought I would feel.